One by one, a virus attacked our little beanie boys. It was a sort of pit weekend, but we're still here. The hardest days are over and for the most part, they are recovered, just cranky still at times.

Personally, this is one of the most difficult things for me to endure. Patience wears thin. Brain cells explode and frustration, bitterness, anger and discontentment come and nag on your back, weighing down your soul. The spirit prays for the mercy and grace of God to pardon sin and give endurance and strength and encouragement.

I am thankful that my boys have recovered. It got scary when Jonah woke up w/ a 102.7 fever. I've never felt any of them that hot. He was burning up hot. So I praise God for His grace and mercies which include medicine. Also, God let it happen to where 2 got sick and then the 3rd was last.. so that's better than all 3 at once. so while the first two were sick, jonah was a happy lad.

it seems to usually balance out like that..and im thankful to God because it's like God's special way of saying, see..my grace is even in YOUR life. wow, mine? oh yes my friends.

Now i just gotta figure out whether i should go to the doctor because of this thing on my arm. the other day ago, i had what i thought was a pimple on my arm.. but then it turned into a bullseye like thing. wondering if it is a spider bite. it's not terribly painful and seems to be coming to an end, so either i'll wait until my arm starts rotting, or i'll go to the darn doctor.

;) happy wednesday everyone. and praise be to God for being awesome despite my limited knowledge and understanding of Him. I pray for the world and for you.

and on a lighter note, I love the sunshine, and Baraka is a good film.


I'm so bored

I'm thinking about reading. It's usually my last pick. I'm hungry for fellowship. Good stimulating conversation. No blogger I know seems to be publishing anything now. Where is everyone? Do you actually have better things to do than blog? Actually, I do like reading. I like reading everyone's blogs to see what's on their minds. That's content I'm interested in. I love knowing what's brewing in others heads. What are they going through. What wisdom can I glean from them? What experiences have they had that can help sharpen my perception of reality.

I've been hearing about brother lawrence's book, practicing the prescence of God. I'm very interested, so if you wanna buy it for me..feel free. Except massi, migue, or mom and josh.. you guys can't buy me stuff because im indebted to you. it will make me feel guilty and my bloodpressure will explode.

i guess i'll go read tuesdays with morrie. u know what.. i actually like reading in bed, at night. then shutting off my light when im feeling the peace. but i can't do it because migue has to sleep w/ the light off. except last night, i snuck in and turned on the light and he didn't notice. i don't like reading out here in the living room much. it's ok but there's something about reading in the bed under the comfy covers..and a pillow..knowing that everyone else is in bed..i can breath. i can sigh.. and i can just think myself to sleep.

i started a little movie w/ some movie clips and photo's. i can't let anyone see it because it has sigur ros' song in it. but it fits so perfectly. it makes me wanna cry. isn't it amazing that you can piece music and film together and it makes your emotions go wild? it's awesome. i just want to flow and fly on a journey of good emotions..and share the experience of love together w/ others. i would love to be able to touch other people's emotions w/ my creativity. knowing that i personally had an effect. but then again, i'd feel bad because it's God's love through me. He's the ultimate emotion toucher. im just an instrument. but it still feels so good.

tuesdays with morrie...

Mesa Acrobats

Sorry about the low light.

My tangent..a possible waste of your time.

Desiring God's rest despite a busy life. Desiring the mind of Christ despite the carnal mind. Desiring a tropical vacation in a secluded area despite the fact that it won't happen. Wanting to sleep until I'm ready to wake up and then pursuing all my ambitions to better mankind and make an eternal difference. to play a part in God's redemptive plan. Despite my inabilities to do what I want, I have to term with my life now, and see the value in the work cut out for me. I have three boys. It's difficult to be consistent with teaching them not to steal and fight. Sometimes I just say, foget about it. I just wanna relax and trust that they'll eventually grow out of it. Motherhood is difficult. Many different voices telling you what to do, makes u weary and u just wanna throw something across the universe. There are other things I'd like to do besides always cook, clean, and say "NO". I love my boys so much I wish I could protect them from every harm, evil, and give them a perfect peace and life. take away every pain they feel and just place them in the heart of God to where they are in love w/ Him, worship Him like no other..and be in perfect harmony with God. People say I'm hard on myself, I don't understand how not to be. my concious demands all the time. other people's voices seem to constantly challenge my judgement. It's hard to recognized misplaced shame, vs. shame stemming from sin. Mothers are doing different things areound the world, in every culture and sub culture. We have African mothers with babes on their backs, toiling in the garden..cooking what ever food they find...singing rich songs that i have no idea what they are saying, but it sounds more like worship to me than the traditional or pop contemporary christian music. perhaps it's because much of "christianity" has horrible associations. well, i dunno. i just can't seem to relate much to the typical church services of today. it's like, that's just one way of worshiping God, and we get brought up into it, it's all we have..so we're like.. okay, this is it. but then when i see the other ways of worship, mainly.. different ethnicities... then i can relate more. seems more raw, organic. diverse! what rich beauty is forsaken without diversity! God is huge man. He has enlivened hearts in the far corners of the world. I really do see things seeming to change though.. if im just a fool speaking, forgive me. sometimes it takes me a while to realize i'm stupid. i dont want to bash anyones pop culture. i just want to see God, and it seems hard for me to see Him when I only see the way american traditional christianity sees it. i might be too general here. i'd be a poor scholar..but oh well. i guess im just in a partial "to hell with it" mentality. I want to figure everything out..and i want to relax, not always worrying about sinning. I mean, i think God wants me to be mindful of sin and to follow Him in righteousness..but not to where i'm always worrying about it. it can drive me nuts. oh man. this is a first morning thought jot. it's scary being transparent..but to hell with it, right? i'm pessimistic and optomistic. depressed and happy. confused and clear. frustrated and weary. there is only one person to deliver me from this, and it is Jesus Christ. That's what I've been taught. It's what my soul knows. I feel guilty for writing this blog. Feeling I must explain things perfectly.. don't offend anyone..dont be too transparent..they might get the wrong idea. i wish i had a highly efficient tongue. Perhaps I'd save some of your time. I'm sorry if this wasn't worth your time. I wonder if it's worth mine. Goodbye people.


Toshiba is gone

Took it back. Turns out it was corrupt as well. Not sure if the Adobe software is linked. Anyhow, now the Mac daddy is being considered.

I'm so glad that there is no more toshiba in our house. it's amazing all the hassle that was attatched. first they gave us the wrong model, then we went back for the right one, then that was corrupt, then we exchanged, then that was was corrupt.

i don't want to complain, but it just amazes me when things like this happen. i wonder how common this experience is. Anyway, makes u wonder what it's all for, trying to find a reason in everything that happens.

i have tons of laundry to do. it's incredible. the boys pee in almost everything they wear. we have to wash the boys' stuffed animals that they sleep w/ in their cribs..and jonah has a monkey. well, it was just washed, and now jonah pee'd on it again last night. my boys drink a lot. i think more than the usual toddler. they just chug their 10 oz. bottles. when it's time for their bottle, they grab it and go to the couch, a chair, or the floor, and either sit down or lay on their backs and just guzzle. especially when it's time for milk. aidan loves the couch or the chaire. he always lays on his back and sometimes he'll be in the kitchen floor. they are so adorable.

when we play with their leggos, migue and i build towers, and the boys just destruct them. they love to destruct. it's interesting.

sometimes asher looks at me like he's very wise. it's like, he's letting me know that he's wiser than what i thought. he squints his eyes, or turns his eyes, and then looks at you in the corner of his eyes. stuff like that. i'm always like, woah. that's so weird! he's only 1.

today, they got the bottle of baby cologne, and somehow opened it up and spilled it all over the wood floor. i went in the living room and found that..and was afraid that they had swallowed some, so i was smelling their breath to see if it smelled like the perfume. it made jonah laugh and he thought i was giving him an eskimo kiss. where u rub noses sideways. so i put my nose right at his mouth and was tryhing to smell, and he would shake his head back and forth trying to eskimo kiss me. i thought i twas cute how he remembered about the eskimo kiss. i call it ekimo. ekk- imo. no s. ekkimo. it's just cute to me.

annnny waaaaaay, that's all i have i think. i have more..but i'd rather dialogue in person.


in search for the perfect pc

took the laptop back to bestbuy and exchanged. this one works a lot better, however..I'm still getting black screens which require me to hard boot. what's up? man..it stinks. oh, and the geeksquad left their cd in my pc. now we have to go back again! it's incredible. i wonder if toshiba's are good anyway..

a continuation.....

This post is in reference to the previous one. So if you want to understand this one read the one below it.

Your cute Massiel. You remind me of Danae. I am responding to your comment here because it turned out to be so lengthy.
I know that not everyone is going to get what is being said there (the post below). But that's okay, I think. The important thing to apprehend from the post really is basic to our faith already. Keeping Christ at the center of all. The Christ who is the Son of God, the one who lived and who was murdered/laid down his own life for mankind and who was raised from the dead to give new life to man and redeem all of creation. Your probably thinking, "Well...why didn't you just say that?" Yes. However that basic fundamental truth is something that has been abandoned in the church in a practical way. (I hope I am putting this acurately. Others can correct me on this and perhaps tell the significance of Newbigins statement in light of our present context. But I will try my best to explain.) The church generally speaking, I don't mean to make an all inclusive sweeping indictment on everyone, the church has sought to define truth by way of external methods that do not foster the truth of Christ in the appropriate way.Instead we have adopted other routes to acheive certainty and "objective fact" via the scientific method. Basically, the church has bought into the false dichotomy (a division into two parts or kinds) of beliefs and facts, reason and revelation. But the truth is that they are inseparable. This separation is significant to what is truly the case for man.
Modernism is the name given to an era of time in which man developed a new approach to understand himself and the world. Instead of starting from tradition (more specifically in that period of that known world the dominant narrative that people lived by was a biblical one of us as creatures and there being a Creator God and we relied upon revelation) man sought to "know" by way of observation with the five senses and reason. The philosophical approach was nothing new really, the picture from the "dark ages" to the "enlightenment" in history is but a continual playing out of the scene in the garden of Eden and the fall of man. The name was given dark ages because we as a race were so-called left in the dark as to the real nature and matter of things. It was only after are pursuit to figure all things out by way of the scientific method that we got very big for our britches and denied the need for revelation and/or church tradition for truth. So man said, "We were so blind and ignorant then. Now we know so much more. Truly this is a period of enlightenment."
While the scientific method was a beautiful and God given gift to man for progressing in our ablities and creativites it was soley pursued without God and His interests. Man worshiped the mind, reason and method over the one Creator who is forever blessed. Our advancements were good, well not all of them....we also advanced in killing one another in much more creative ways (nuclear weapons) and destroying the world that God called us to tend and have dominion over in loving care and nurture.
What this has also done for man and our race is given us a false sense of security. Thinking that we are able to figure out all of our problems, create Utopia and abolish evil, we perpetuated evil and spilled more blood than ever before in history combined following "our wisdom". Everyone is power hungry beneath their good intentions to do good. Everyone has what they think is in the best interest for another, all the while the hearts desperate wickedness plots to arise to the throne of God and be worshipped and served. (Or just fill their bellys with whatever they want at the expense of anyone else). Everyone has their ideas of what is in the best interest for their community, state, country, nation and world. But there is no final arbiter or standard by which we are accountable. Their is no ultimate rule by which a "value" is defined. No one has any point of reference to determine for themselves what is good for me except their own belly's and desires. And this is disastrous. Man thinks that there is a difference between faith and fact. He thinks that a belief has to do with speculative musings that are left to the realm of imagination and that has no place in the public sector of life and therefore is someting personal only to you. Facts are those things by which we will be governed by if anything. The facts have all to do with everyone they say. But the truth is that the so-called facts are determined by an already established belief or faith in a method or world-view. Fortunately man has begun to recognize that their thinking is nothing but governed by a faith in something. This is the strength of Post-Modernism. Post-Modernism acknowledges that all our thinking is subject to context. That is we as humans are born into an established pattern of thinking, a language and culture that already is. Inherent within this context lies our "truth". Not all cultures are the same so man now concludes that truth is relative to the context of a people whether geographically or historically. The level of tolerance to what is truth now becomes extreme relativity. Except......except for the "fact" if you will, of "truth is relative". So really postmodernism is just another step in the evolutionary thought of man. The Biblical narrative already has this fact being the case, that objectivity is really a false notion if you separate it from subjectivity. Certainty lies only in belief. Certainty lies only in faith.
So like all philosophies or thinking outside of subordination to the revealed mind of God we are as a race left without guidance. Our culture (secular and ecclesial) is beginning to recognize that "reason" is not some disembodied faculty that contains it's own complex system for determining information in and of themselves. Reason is at the service of others. Knowledge is personal and not impersonal. We need someone to tell what is and what is not. The trust factor of knowledge is inevitable and inescapable. We need others to tell us what is. And it is not something that is discovered but rather given. No one possess's it.
The claims that Jesus makes of himself to follow Him and for us to then know the truth and be made free is exactly what our parents, teachers, politicians and authority figures claim. The question is who are you following? Who is telling you how to live? Who is guiding your life and decisions? Everyone is constantly being "converted" to something. All the idealogies out there from political to the philosophical to the religous are established and/or even progressive "truths" to live by. None is "free" to be whatever they want and to make one's own decision to be. Freedom is relative to the data given. You can only do what you are given.....
All this to say that Jesus Christ, his words, his life is the point of reference that we must live by. He is the clue to history. The clue doesn't lie within us or somewhere outside in the material world, although Christ himself became material for us. Now of course that is basic to your thinking already right? Perhaps it is. The qoute I have posted speaks more to the academic realm and the established leadership in our culture that our informed at the highest levels. It is to show, illustrate that we are finite and dependant. Ultimately it is for us all in saying that the only thing we can be certain about is God himself. God in Christ.

Forgive me if I have only complicated this. I am not very good at being clear in communicating. Feel free to ask questions. This would help me too.
The address of Jesus is an indictment for all time. Especially for our time now. It is a very unique word to the secular and church culture.

"Faith alone is certainty. Everything but faith is subject to doubt. Jesus Christ alone is the certainty of faith."

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Ethics


"...the most radical attack possible on modernity" and postmodernity.

"If you continue in my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free."
John 8:31

Is not this a wonder of a statement? If when we hear the teaching of Jesus Christ and continue in it, that is believe/obey one "really" is his disciple. The wonder of it all to me is that it is only after one becomes a disciple (continues in his teaching, believeing/obeying) the we know the truth, and that we are made free from the truth.

Man seeks to put upon himself the title and job description of being a god. Man wants to define and set the boundaries to things. Man want's to be free to make his own decisions as to what is and is not. Man says, "I will be converted by no one. I will be my own destiny maker."
But man, "You already are converted by something or someone. Question is who will you be converted by?"

Lesslie Newbigin says about the words of Christ qouted above,

"Here we seem to have a direct reversal of one of the axioms of modernity, namely, that freedom of inquiry, freedom to think and speak and publish, is the way - the only way - to the truth. Jesus appears to reverse this. Truth is not a fruit of freedom; it is the precondition for freedom."
The "world is not free as it thinks it is. We are not honest inquirers seeking the truth. We are alienated from truth and are enemies of it. We are by nature idolaters, constructing images of truth shaped by our own desire......It is absurd to say, as many do, that the traditional Christian teaching about the radical corruption of human nature comes from sources alien to the Jesus of the Gospels - St. Paul and St. Augustine being the prime suspects. This radical judgment on human nature is part of the very marrow of the New Testament witness. It would be strictly intolerable and therefore unbelievable if it were not seen through the eyes of those who have been brought to a new life by the resurrection of Jesus from the dead and by the gift of the Holy Spirit.....there are those who have been brought through the death and burial of the old self, that self which was confident in its own power to know the truth, and who have been incorporated into the life of him who is the truth and who is able to lead us into the truth. It is they alone who are truly free."

"Because this is so, the witness that Christians bear to the truth must be a humble and penitent witness. This dying and being brought to life is something that must be continually renewd, reknown, and reenacted throughout life. The confession of the truth will be part of a continual indebtedness to grace. It will never be the kind of certainty which supposes that I can become a possessor of the truth by the exercise of my own natrual powers. It will mean that my understanding of the truth must be constantly open to revision and correction, but - and this the crucial point - only and always within the irreversible commitment to Jesus Christ. If that commitment is questioned, then I am once again a clueless wanderer in the darkness, bamboozled by the products of my own imagination. The strength of the liberal tradition is its willingness to be open to new truth. And the gospel itself makes this liberal mind possible; for if we know that Jesus is indeed the Word made flesh, the visible and knowable presence in the midst of history from whom and for whom all things exist, then we shall meet new experiences of any kind of reality with the confidence that we are given the clue for their understanding. But if that clue itself is questioned or abandoned, then we become clueless playthings of the winds and waves of fashion, "blown about by every wind of doctrine."

Newbigin, Lesslie, "Proper Confidence: Faith, Doubt & Certainty in Christian Discipleship." Eerdmans Publishing Company, Grand Rapids, MI. (1995) Pgs. 68, 69 and 70.

Jesus Christ is the meaning of history.


YES! I'm a Geek.

It works! Praise God for the wisdom to open my system recovery and reinstall some wireless stuff. I didn't know exactly what I was doing, but it worked. After atleast 12 hours of frying my brain cells, I feel some brain recovery..and our laptop is not malfunctioning. Soooo happy.. oh man.. so relieved. all over wireless internet. I think I've learned more about troubleshooting maybe I can be on the geeksquad. Now we can make our movies and get rich and famous.

Hope everyone has a good weekend. I hope ours will be refreshing. Istraos? Mass, is that how you say stars in spanish?

I'm learning it on Dora. ;)

horrible network problems

is it wierd? or is it weird!

it's wierd.

everytime. literally, every time..i always have computer issues. we got a new computer and i cannot configure the wireless network. spoke w/ att, spoke with toshiba, back and forth and mentally upside down.

i think i was troubleshooting for like 5 hours atleast. i wanted to get it knocked out tonight so i wouldn't have to mess with it tomorrow, but my desires will go unmet. i guess i gotta call back tomorrow. i've done everything they told me to do, and everything i could imagine to do.

anyway, that's my blogworthy frustration for the night! it's just frustrating when i feel like i've wasted time to no avail. a part of me likes it, computer problem solving, but then once i'm done, or as it is right now, (pending), I feel disoriented from reality a bit. I feel like I'm a computer gadget and I don't like it. I know that's strange..but I can't figure out how to explain it.

So, waste the time...waste the time..!


My heavy heart

what do you blog about when you're angry at the world's destruction? When you hate sin, thankfully, because God has redeemed you to love righteousness. And yet I myself still sin. Redeemed..and ignorant. I have a new heart, a heart that longs after the heart of God. I want to worship God and no other thing. I want to absolutely fall in love with Him to where any human romance would seem shallow. I want to love people and be an instrument of hope into their souls. I know I cannot change things when I want...or even how I want. I feel impatience settling in when I yearn to make a difference in this world. I want to protect people. I want to love people. It's like, I want to make all things new. Like Christ. Except I can't. So, I know some things I can do. I can simply aim to excell in righteousness.

So how do you set your mind to aim for perfection when you know you won't be perfect?

How do you not allow doubt and fear to stop you from even aiming in the first place?

What do we do when we have so many questoins, and no one to listen to us?

So many people are hurting in this world. So many things are happening.

Sometimes a want a break from the difficulties I experience. And yet I feel guilty for wanting a break, knowing that I need to be thankful for what I do have..and to press on..to trust God.

So, if I ever find myself resting in some luxurious moment, what happens if I'm interrupted with the house of mourning? I should not persist to remain in my pleasure!

Being that there is a time for everything, it is hard for me to know when I can rest, when I should pray..when I should do this, think that, feel this or that. So, I usually just get stuck in this state of hungry limbo. Just gettin by. Doing life, feeling guilty as I introspect on all the things I could have done better, or am doing wrong. Guilt comes in...discouragement settles.. and then there is a voice that says, " is it true? is God merciful to ME? Will He always understand? How do I talk to Him? How shall I revere Him? How do I prostrate myself? I just want to hide my face and ask for forgiveness..and yet I'm told that God is a God who lifts up your head.

Oh, and the questions never cease. And they never get answered for good. I'm so hungry to be taught truth. I want to grow out of doubt..and into faith and courage. I dunno. Man. I'm just so hungry for fellowship. And it seems like such a challenging thing. To have fellowship. Gottaplan it. Hope the kids behave. Hope everyone feels comfortable with being real. Breaking the ice..finally getting down and funky with raw fellowship and then someone goes home..and im like, NOOOO DON"T GO HOME. I wanna go for hours!

Okay thanks for listening to me. Hope I didn't burden you.


C.S. Lewis quote

"... It is easy to think that the Church has a lot of different objects-education, building, missions, holding services. Just as it is easy to think the State has a lot of different objects-military, political, economic, and what not. But in a way things are much simpler than that. The state exists simply to promote and to protect the ordinary happiness of human beings in this life. A husband and wife chatting over a fire, a couple of friends having a game of darts in a pub, a man reading a book in his own room or digging in his own garden-that is what the State is there for. . .
In the same way the Church exists for nothing else but to draw men into Christ, to make them little Christs. If they are not doing that, all the cathedrals, clergy, missions, sermons, even the Bible itself, are simply a waste of time. God became Man for no other purpose. It is even doubtful, you know, whether the whole universe was created for any other purpose."


This Morning

Aidan, Jonah, Asher.


My prayer for us all

May God have mercy on us all. Indeed He has shown mercy to the world by being a humble King. He rules over us, and yet He didn't demand to be served as a King. He instead served us, and then died for us. He submitted to the Fathers will. He lived a perfect life. He has perfect love. Perfect forgiveness. He is love. He is greater than my every dream. His enemy lies constantly..and would have it that we, God's people..live in fear and condemnation for the rest of our lives. Jesus said, the evil one seeks to destroy. Prowling around, like a lion.

We need to encourage one another to look to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith. I need it desperately every day. We need to be tender to one another. Slow to speak. Quick to listen. We need to always seek to forgive one another, as God has forgiven us. May God have mercy always on us, and give us the ability through His Holy Spirit to live rightly all our days here. To have the strength to do what we need to do every day. Please forgive our unbelief, Lord. Help us to not get caught in things that do not matter. Things that You wouldn't want us to get caught up in. Give us wisdom to discern that.

God bless every reader of this post, with Your peace, Your love, increase their faith. Help us to always manifest Christ to eachother. We all need eachother.


Oh yes My friends... Oh yes...

I'm reading a book called For Women Only, on how to understand the incredible men in the universe. :) It's a needed thing to read.

I'm thankful that Migue goes to the grocery store. I hate the grocery store. Migue puts up with it. Thank you Migue for all your sacrifice. It is so awesome. The grocery store depresses me, unless I'm not in a depressed mood. I think I have a consistent meloncholy disposition, so the grocery store puts me in "double depression." as the big brother would put it. Kidding. Lots of big brother jokes lately.

I had the munchies..the kind you just have to do something about. Didn't have chips..but I had Goldfish, my friends. So I had salsa-cheese-goldfish soup. It put an end to my craves. And the goldrish only had like 20 carbs per 55 fish? I think that's how it goes. I normally don't do the white stuff, so now the condemning thoughts are peering their evil heads. They don't master me.

I'm thankful for the internet..for blogs. It really helps me to connect to people being that I can't get out a lot. And I'm thankful for my ancient laptop. It's a soldier.

my cat bubby deserves honor of the world reward for being such a wonderful pet. his hips are bad and always have been. getting worse..he still walks though. i feel sorry for him. i love him so much. i got hiim free from some party back before my thoughts and deeds were turned to Christ. i wish i could really let him know how much i love him. i really think animals are incredible creatures and can experience bonding relationship emotions w/ humans. and to you who laugh, get a pet and be converted.

much love and thanks to God for loving us fools.



I have struggled with the polemic surrounding the issue of infant-baptism for well over a year. My studies into hermeneutics and presuppositions have led me to the conclusion that it is appropriate and warranted Biblically for the children of believers to be baptised. Because of this back in February our sons were baptised. It was a joyous and emotionally filled occasion to celebrate the mercies of God's covenantal graces. Because of this I also would like to encourage my friends who have Baptistic theological leanings to consider the lynchpin data in all of this polemic. While I would like to write on the matter and could do so, I would rather post a link to my brother-in-law Joshua whom is a very competant, well read, studied and good writer of theological issues. He has begun a series on this subject and would hope to see some dialogue on this. I look foward to it.

Refuting Baptists: Part 1

Also, for those who hate this kind of stuff because it may seem divisive and sectarian I would encourage you to not look at this as "in house" fighting, but rather as good informed, civilized, Christ honoring dialogue about seeking clarity on church practice. It is my prayer that you would be provoked to think on this issue and perhaps be navigated to think more astutely about theology, presuppositions and it's relationship to how we do and be the Church.



Cinco De Mayo

I donno the depth of the story.. but the mexicans defeated the french and today is when they celebrate it.

i kinda just liked the idea of celebrating w/ big sombrero's and some authentic mexican food and live music. but it wouldn't be complete w/out Jesus and Massi! Jesus could bring a big Jalapeno the size of a bathtub and we could all pass out w/ the exception of Jesus, who could probably put it in the juicer and still live.

arros con leche vamos a com el e Jalapeno esta noche!

Bad Coffee

I brewed some coffee and poured it into Migue's travel mug w/ the aluminum liner? it was horrible. it made the coffee taste like dull chrome. weird. anyway, had to brew some more and now im drinking it.

my pinky toe gets pulled to the side every so often and it hurts..and i was doing airplane w/ my boys(where u lay on back and lift them up w/ your feet and say, "airplaaaaane") and my pinkie toe got popped and i go.. ' my tinkie poe just got popped!' And so it made me laugh that i said tinkie poe. it sounds kinda cute. anything for a good laugh, right?

aidan pee'd a pond last night in his crib. he musta drank like a gallon of juice-water.

my coffee still tastes wierd! i wonder what it is. it's like there is a curse put upon my coffee from that travel mug. is that why you didnt take it to work mig? or did u wake up too late to brew coffee?

migue's workin super hours today..his job, plus side work w/ Josh, which is lawn care. So he gets home at like 8 and he's slammed. We might go out anyway tonight if we can get a babysitter. i wish i could go to italy for a day.. ireland would do fine. even london!

thanks massi for the link.


Piggly Winks !!!!!

He is so cute! I love him..he makes me happy. He has such a cute voice. I think there is a part of my soul that belongs in Europe and the UK. I think Piggly Winks is Irish.


10,000 Days

It was realeased today. I got it. Now I listen and study. Contrary to the ignorant musings of many in the world; Christian community or otherwise, Tool is one of the most remarkable bands of this time. A "band" that truly is united in a profound way musically. Lyrically progressive, musically pioneers. May God have mercy on them and us all.

I am excited. Maybe I will share on what I discover, or rather observe with my audible and cognitive senses.



Green Tea
Chai Latte
A clean house
Gold walls
Vintage furniture
Taking photo's
kissing my little boys cheeks and listen to them talk in their own language..and nod my head saying, " i know! that's what mama thinks, that's incredible!" and mumbo jumbo back.
God's grace
God's truth
God's peace
Christ is alive right now.
Nothing can separate his love from us. Nothing! Nothing! Priase Almighty God who has amazing love. Can't nobody hold Him down!!@#%!@#%@#% oh no.. he keeps on moving!
A sense of humor and finding out thatGod is the maker and giver of every good thing.
God is the ultimate Creator.
Look at Creation and let your mind be blown.
and yet He is still bigger.. my mind comes to an end of dreams..and yet God is beyond our dreams.

I wonder what eternity holds.


Sleepless Night

Asher kept waking up last night, along w/ the others. So I feel extremely slammed. I am waiting for noon for them to take their nap, and I plan on crashing like there is no tomorrow. I want to sleep in a cloud of bliss forever. Sleep rules. I miss the good ol' days of being lazy. Hey, I'm being honest. No, really, I actually prefer a good well balanced active meaningful life. I just need sleep to do that. Us young mums have a hard time getting the proper rest we need. Somehow God gives us the grace to endure. It's usually not this difficult for me but I ran out of my multivitamins and I had taco bell last night. Horrible stuff. I wish we could live off of healthy smoothies. Sometimes food is an anoyance. Especially the white stuff..it just makes u puffy and insulin resistant. Me atleast. I gotta stay away from it. And I had cake yesterday at Ella's b-day party.

Last night, tryin to go to sleep, I started cracking up and shaking the bed w/ my laughter. Migue did you notice? Migue was trying to sleep. But I was thinking about how Migue bought Ella's b-day present at the dollar store, which is all we could afford..Ella is 3. So Migue comes home w/ these 2 stuffed animals. One is a little hippo, which he attached a sign to saying it was Danae. And the other was some odd creature, we couldn't figure out what it was. He put a sign on it saying it was Migue. He was hoping she would appreciate it and remember us, since we don't get to see her often. Migue, that was a very thoughtful gift. But u know how 3 year old girls are.. well, some people do atleast. She got lots of girly fun stuff, like a dora jump rope, a backpack w/ kitchen supplies in it. a dora chair, and she's all excited and going through all her presents..and then she gets a purse, which she loved..and then she opened our gift! and her dad, my bro Nate, was sittin down in front of her..so she opened our gift and looked at them, ripped off migue's sign, and threw them both down on nathan! haha! oh man, we laughed. it was like the two boys in christmas carol getting socks and they threw them over their shoulders. so i reassured migue that she will probably appreciate the gifts when she's older. Righ tnow, stuffed animals aren't big to Ella..she's more into becoming a woman w/ girlly things.

:) anyway, that make me laugh .. i was also laughing at my brother Josh, who always comments on my patchouli oil when i wear it. i usually combine it w/ another frangrance, but he always notices it..and says it smells like weed. He says, " u smell like hippie weed." it's awesome because josh and i go back in the day w/ our pagan origins. So, we appreciate it.

Anyway, i thought i'd share that, since i haven't blogged about what goes in my head since Kong.